I cant take any of the credit for this one. I read it on a forum on another website and thought it was so funny that it would be a shame for anyone to miss out on what I think is an Absolute Corker!

A man staggers into the casualty department with concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.

Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.

"Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, Rebecca, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a field of cows.
We went to look for them, and while I was searching around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end.

I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it, stuck right in the middle of the cow's ****.

That's when I made my big mistake."

"What did you do?" asks the doctor.

"Well, I lifted the cow's tail and yelled to my wife,

'Hey, this looks like yours!

I don't remember much after that."