Why do men die first?

thudpucker · #1 (**permalink**) February 20th, 2009

I can't believe if men know all this,
why they just won't conform.

Why do men die first? This is a question that
has gone unanswered for centuries, but now
we know. It requires a bit of explanation, first:

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to
protect her from the rat race ... you're a male
chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework
... you're a pansy.. If you work too hard ... there's
never any time for her. If you don't work enough .....
you're a good-for-nothing bum. If she has a
boring repetitive job with low pay ... this is exploitation.
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay .....
you should get off your lazy behind and find
something better. If you get a promotion
ahead of her ... that is favoritism. If she gets
a job ahead of you ..... its equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks ... its sexual
harassment. If you keep quiet ..... its male indifference.
If you cry ... you're a wimp. If you don't ..... you're
an insensitive *******. If you make a decision
without consulting her ...... you're a chauvinist.

If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's
a liberated woman. If you ask her to do something
she doesn't enjoy ... that's domination.
If SHE asks you ... it's a favor. If you appreciate the female
form and frilly underwear ..... you're a pervert.
If you don't ... you're gay.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in
shape ... you're sexist. If you don't ... you're unromantic.
If you try to keep yourself in shape ..... you're vain.
If you don't ... you're a slob. If you buy her flowers ...
you're after something. If you don't ... you're not
thoughtful.. If you're proud of your achievements ...
you're full of yourself. If you don't ... you're not
ambitious. If she has a headache... she's tired.
If you have a headache ..... you don't love her
anymore. If you want it too often ... you're
oversexed. If you don't ... there must be someone
else.

Why do men die first?

Because they want to.