Without reading your post in major detail before I disappear/retire, a well optimised LW should be able to connect to files by itself (given a certain no. of mins for the old incompletes to load & settle down - depending upon how many you have!)
By resume I meant hitting the resume or Find Sources option. Manual searching if needed is better. And no, LW should not always require baby-sitting. Just occasionally. If it's any more than this then perhaps yo should look at some optimising hints:
http://www.gnutellaforums.com/showth...5&pagenumber=1 http://www.gnutellaforums.com/showth...threadid=27036 & also Search & dwnld techniques (some hints):
http://www.gnutellaforums.com/showth...4545#post94545
With those xtra large files though, perhaps there's just no reliable outcome. There's too many factors to counter in. Applying certain techniques may help though.
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I never use the force resume tab to relieve this problem as I have found that it rarely works
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In all honesty, although it can be effective, I don't recommend it. It can have side-FX. Particularly if used on too many files!